Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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