I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
