She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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