we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Randomize
