last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
