I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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