your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
