i jhust puked up my retainher.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize
