So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
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