Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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