i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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