we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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