I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
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