We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
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