Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
