Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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