He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
