BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
