were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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