we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
