I can't breathe out the right side of my face
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
It's official drugs can't kill me
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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