oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
