Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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