No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
