i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
you inspire me to be a worse person
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
