This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
And then he peed in my hair
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
