I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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