absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize
