Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize