It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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