1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
you never un-have a 4some
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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