franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
