There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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