he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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