im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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