We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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