he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
i think my cat just said my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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