Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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