My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
So apparently I’m into choking now
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