Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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