Midget sex pt 2 tonight
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
