I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
