I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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