oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
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Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
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then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
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