I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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