What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
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