Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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