I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
