he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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