I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
