I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
